Super Cat and Fat Cat

Fly away, Batman. Stop bugging us, Spiderman. A new super hero has surfaced. From very humble beginnings, Super Cat emerged from our basement six months ago and was able to purr his way into our apartment.

Originally equipped with rabbit-like powers, Super Cat used to hop around, propelling himself forward with his tiny, yet powerful, back legs. Cabbit, as he was affectionately called, did grow out of his bunny-like form and into his ears. His eyes stayed round though. Although he does still knead and suck on blankets, now he is exhibiting other super powers; those of a canine.

Some time ago, Super Cat decided that one of the missus’ slippers would prove to be a suitable adversary. Keep in mind that he is a small animal – at most the length and height of one and a half shoes. Undeterred by size, Super Cat was determined to take on that slipper. It was a struggle of bizarre proportions – like watching Justin Beiber take on Arnold Schwarzenegger. In true David and Goliath form, Super Cat triumphed over the feeble slipper, leaving all our footwear severely shaken.

Despite the abundance of super hero training equipment (aka cat toys), Super Cat enjoys the simpler things in life, like relaxing in the tub, and then dragging the plug into the living room. The plug doesn’t put up as much fight as indoor foot apparel, but what it lacks in joie de vivrem*, it more than compensates for with mobility.

Excessive happiness, which all slippers have in abundance.

Super Cat loves grocery day. He enjoys jumping in and out of grocery bags. Unfortunately, he usually doesn’t wait for me to unpack them. Once the bags are empty, Super Cat wastes no time in transforming them into giant capes.

Just as Yoda was Luke’s mentor, Super Cat also has an apprentice. Fat Cat, Super Cat’s oversized assistant and sparring partner, is equipped with the adorable power of slothfulness. Several days after his staff* left the island without providing suitable accommodations for him, Fat Cat joined forces with Super Cat.

* Dogs have owners; cats have staff.

Diet is an important part of any super hero’s routine. Super Cat’s food bowl is seldom empty, but the food on our plates is apparently more appealing than pellets. Like a desperate businessman in a banker’s office, Super Cat has learned the art of begging. One night, the missus caved and gave chicken to both Super Cat and his protégé. Fat Cat curiously approached Super Cat’s bowl. For the first time, we heard Super Cat growl. I didn’t even know cats could growl. If anything, I thought they roared.

An integral part of super hero life is communication. Most cats meow. Not ours. Super Cat chirps. Maybe he is trying to tweet. I thought connecting the blog to my Twitter account might be trouble… Fat Cat on the other hand does a pretty decent imitation of a siren. That, or he is working on an advertising campaign for Nintendo’s Wii U.

Raising a pair of super heroes can be challenging, but they provide more entertainment than basic cable and are more affordable. They can get a little out of hand sometimes, but they keep things interesting, especially on grocery day. Who knew that adopting a pair of homeless kittens would result in the discovery of super heroes?

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