Hanging up the Headset
After nine months of being a call centre agent, I very reluctantly decided to hang up the head set. Except that I wasn’t very reluctant, and I didn’t “hang up” the head set as much as slam it down. I do miss the people I work with (although thankfully I am still in touch with many of them), but I certainly do not miss the angry voices that came through the head set.
One might see this as the end of an era … but after all the yelling and the screaming coming I endured during my time as an ”agent”, it’s just the end of an ear.
None the less, here are some of the more memorable calls I took.
During one call, the customer, after screaming blue murder, suddenly became very quiet, so I followed protocol.
“Customer, are you there?”
Immediately, customer replied, “NO!”
(Would I have been penalized for hanging up at this point? Customer admitted that they were not there…)
“I’m sorry, sir. You have failed to validate the account. I will have to transfer you to our billing department for further assistance. Thank you for calling ABC Telecom. Please hold for a transfer.”
“But you said you were going to get me through to billing?”
“Yes, sir, that’s why I asked you to please hold for a transfer.”
“I’m sorry to hear that you would like to cancel your service with us. May I ask why?”
“I thought my TV was gonna be $19.95 a month, but my bill is so complicated. I have to add $7 a month for the second TV box? Why is it so complicated?”
“I do apologize for the inconvenience there, ma’am. (with the mic turned off) After all, adding 7 to 19.95 is as complex as mathematics comes.”
“Thank you for calling ABC Telecom. This is Joe speaking.”
“Yes, Misses Joe, …” (I can almost hear Julius Malema, “Can’t you see he’s a woman!”)
“So what speed of DSL would you like to order today?”
“No, I don’t want DSL, I want internet.”
“I was shocked when I turned on the TV. I wanted to watch ‘The Devil Wears Prada’, but what came on was ‘The Devil Wears Nada’!”
“You mean I have to wait 7 days for TV? I have kids here. What are they gonna do with no TV?”
“(with the mic turned off) You might want to invest in those things called “books”. Teach the kids to open them, then move on to getting them to read.”
“I d-n’t –eed tele- serv-. I –ve gre- -one serv- now. And it’s cheap-, -oo.”
“(with the mic turned off) You get what you pay for. Can you hear me now?”
For quality assurance reasons, I must end this blog entry. Please feel free to check back for updates at your earliest convenience 😛